Hi gang, Craig here once again with an odd topic this time, etiquette. It may seem like an strange topic for a writing blog, but I promise you it’s applicable.
If you read enough about writing you’ll come across a line similar to this: Never give them a reason to say ‘No.’
This dates back to the days of huge New York publishing. You needed an agent, but those agents desperately want to say no to projects. Imagine one person, with about ten-thousand manuscripts, all begging to be read. They must get through that pile somehow, and any reason to put one down allows them to move to the next one.
Step it up to the publisher, and the job is no simpler. The work has been vetted, but they still have more than they can handle. It’s lather, rinse, repeat.
I mentioned this to walk you into the modern world. Today, we don’t need an agent or publisher to bring our work to market. Those piles of books have been foisted upon the buyers to sort through.
From here, this post could go a thousand directions, from editing, grammar, story structure, etcetera, but I promised a post about etiquette.
You’re going to get to a point where the book exists, your family and friends have purchased their copies, and you’re going to need promotion.
You can pay for a lot of different kinds of promotion, with mixed results. The one that always performs best for me is to visit blogs where I am welcome and talk about my new story over there. My friends have friends who I may not know yet. Reaching those people is kind of important.
Making that first layer of friends is paramount. You do this by interacting with people who come by your sites. Pick your poison, could be Facebook, Goodreads, your blog, your newsletter, etc.
Interaction is not definitive enough here. Don’t be an ass. There, I said it. When you are 
online, you are an author with a public persona. If you’re a member of private Facebook groups or various rooms elsewhere, you might let your guard down. Even then, do so with caution.
Your political view, social opinions, views on current events, and others may not be acceptable to some people. Ask yourself if you’re giving someone a reason to say “no” before you press that last button. Things tend to live forever on the internet. There have been several smear campaigns against the newly famous based upon something they posted on Twitter ten years ago.
Eventually, you’re going to make some online friends. If they have something to promote, make your space available to them. Don’t wait, offer your space. I’ve done this for years, and it works miracles. When I occasionally have something to promote, there are any number of people who will let me borrow their space. I might note, I’ve never given them a reason to say ‘No.’
When you are a guest at someone else’s Facebook room, blog, Goodreads room, act as if you’re standing in their living room with their children present. Don’t start a donnybrook in the comments thread. If someone else posts something off color, don’t escalate the situation.
You are expected to participate in the comments. It’s your book being promoted, so consider the comments as yours. Obviously, some will be directed to the host, but you can still hit the like button to let them know you’re reading along.
If someone says something encouraging, or nice, it is appropriate to offer a thank you. If they mention buying your book it’s expected. Believe me, people will buy books they decide not to read, or return to get their money back. If you happen to move a few copies, your next anticipation will be a favorable review. Nobody owes you one, but it would be nice, don’t give them a reason to say ‘No.’
Personally, I try to return to posts for three days. Some readers won’t get there for a while. It only takes a moment to sift through the comments. On WordPress blogs, you can follow the comments, so you’ll get notification of when there is something new for you. While you’re there, hit those sharing buttons one more time. This is how you get the word out about your product.
Inside your post, it is expected to invite people to follow you on social media and provide a few links. Places like BookBub and Goodreads are pretty helpful. Even if someone merely adds your book to their Goodreads list it helps you. Never give them a reason not to add you.
I’m fast approaching 800 words here. I write speculative fiction along with about a million other authors. This includes paranormal stories, and Halloween is fast approaching. You may never pick one of my books out of that gigantic pile, but I haven’t given anyone a reason to say, ‘No.’
Story Empire 
This was outstanding. Made my day.
I am grateful we did not have this technology when I was in my 20’s. I had no borders. I did however have a mouth that went a mile. I am now blessed with common sense. When I see something political or religion based I avoid it. There is no win. I say thank you and please and I always return favors. I’m pretty sure I’m turning into my grandfather and that’s fine by me.
I have now written a novel. it is release and I am slowly learning. But I don’t mind, I’ll get there.
Huge thanks for this.
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I hoped it would help someone, Bryan. We have to be acutely aware of our public image.
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What an excellent lesson in author etiquette, Craig! You made some very valid points and I totally agree with them all. I’ve had to take FB posts down before because of negative political comments. I won’t play that game with anyone on social media. I’m always nice. Well, that’s just me, but on social media, I think it’s extra important! Great post!
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You are always nice, but it might help someone out there. New people are coming into the business, and maybe I can prevent an issue somewhere.
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Great post, Craig. Meeting new people and making new friends should be considered a privilege, not a right. I have met so many supportive and genuinely caring people on my journey into this crazy world of writing. I appreciate the gift of their valuable time and reciprocate whenever I can. Other people’s wisdom will always assist me to grow.
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That’s a wonderful way to look at it. Thank you.
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Excellent post, Craig. The one thing that amazed me was the number of authors who do not even show up the day the guest post is run let alone your three days.
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I don’t understand it either. I want to be engaged with people.
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I rarely have a guest who doesn’t respond to comments, but it has happened on occasion. When it does, I always feel bad for my readers who took the time to read and comment. We develop such rapport with the people who frequent our blogs and support us with their comments. Such a great blogging community we have!
As far as the rants that sometimes explode from blog posts, I made a rule a long time ago never to discuss hot button issues. Just.Not.Gonna.Happen.
This was an excellent post, Craig. One of my favorite.
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Glad you enjoyed it.
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Great advice, Craig. I like this attitude.
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Great post Craig. I fully agree it is important to respond and to be careful how you do so. Yes, sometimes it doesn’t take much, a missed response to get that no.
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You get it, but it might help someone out there.
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🙂
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Good post. The Golden Rule applies to the internet as much as to life. Most of us need all the encouragement we can get:)
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It really is that simple, but I had to expand to get blog length. Ha ha.
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Well, I enjoyed it, even expanded:)
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Excellent post, Craig. I have had a couple authors who did not respond to one comment on my site. I know that I think I wish they would respond. People do look for that. A like or a comment will go a long way with many. And it only takes a minute.
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Great post and wonderful advice. I haven’t gotten to the point where I’ve released any of my stories and there’s so much that I don’t know – this post was really helpful in walking through some of the aspects of promotion (something we all probably need to work on). Thanks for this! And good luck! 🙂
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Simply interacting on other sites is a big part. Make friends. When you need a place to promote, those are the people you will count on. You’ve been pretty regular at my site. When you need promo, I’d be happy to host something for you.
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That’s so helpful and so kind! If you’d like, you can do a promo on my site as well, though I have no idea what that would look like. The idea is exciting though! How does all of that work? What are the mechanics involved?
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Basically, we take it to email. The guest sends the materials to the host. I try to exchange email about when, etc. the host assembles and schedules. My email coldhand.boyack@gmail.com
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Awesome! I’ll email you soon!
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Cool, thanks.
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Excellent post, Craig. I’ve been fortunate in that so far guest authors on my site are good to respond to comments. I did have a situation a few months back where several bloggers posted by book cover reveal on the same day. Some of my comments on their blogs went to spam. A simple email to the author asking them to check spam and release the comments took care of the issue.
But to downright not answer or respond is the height of rudeness. If someone ever acted like that on my blog, they would not get a second chance.
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I kind of feel that way, but I’ve hosted hundreds of authors. (I can’t keep track of them all.)
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Haha, don’t be an ass. Love it. Seriously though, what’s a donnybrook?? And Goodreads groups?? I must be out of the loop!
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A donnybrook is a fight. There are groups you can join on Goodreads. P. H. Solomon of Story Empire fame has one.
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Aha!
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Great post, Craig. Recently, I’ve hosted two authors and neither took the time to reply to any of the lovely comments they received from my blog readers and supporters. As the host, I made sure to reply to each and every one, but I felt terrible. Then from the other side, I recently appeared on a book blogging site and any comments I left ended up deleted by the host … even though I then checked and asked did he want me to leave comments. The answer was yes, so I tried again. Same result. I don’t know if any of my online friends tried commenting or not, but that was an equally frustrating situation. And now, on my blog posts, I have someone who uses ALL CAPS, which is yelling in internet speak and not good etiquette, and that person keeps giving me hassle about being told his/her messages are spam … they’ve never ended up in my spam folder, so I’m kind of stuck there. All I can think is that they have to write more than three words before WordPress will let them submit a comment … sometimes I just feel like giving up, but then I have such a lot of wonderful online friends who make it all worthwhile. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Reblogged on: https://harmonykent.co.uk/something-to-think-about/
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Thanks, Harmony. Sometimes we have to bend a little. If that means turning off the caps, so be it. Thanks for the reminder to check spam here today.
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Reminds me of that old adage, “if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all…”
Good manners, being polite and helpful costs nothing, but worth their weight in gold…
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Exactly. It costs nothing, but rudeness can put people off. It might even be others who aren’t involved in the conversations.
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