Hi, SE Readers. Joan here today. We’ve all heard of similes and metaphors. Most of us have probably used them in our writing at some point. Using a simile or metaphor is an easy way to describe a character’s personality or what they are feeling.
Both similes and metaphors are used to make comparisons, but there is a difference. A smile uses the words “like” or “as” to compare things. Let’s look at some examples:
He watched her like a hawk.
Life is like a box of chocolates. (Forrest Gump)
She was as cold as ice.
Metaphors, on the other hand, state a direct comparison.
He is an impenetrable wall.
All the world is a stage. (William Shakespeare)
All our words are but crumbs that fall down from the feast of the mind. (Khalil Gibran)
Both similes and metaphors can be useful tools. They can spark a reader’s imagination and at the same time, get your message across.
For instance, take the quote from Forrest Gump. If you’ve ever been the recipient of a mixed box of chocolates without the benefit of knowing what is inside each piece, you understand. You might bite into one expecting to find almonds or pecans inside and find it’s filled with yucky orange or lemon cream. Like the chocolates, life is filled with unexpected twists and turns, and not all of them are pleasant.
But can we overuse similes or metaphors? Is there a better way to convey our message?
The keyword here is show. Don’t tell. Yes, we hear this advice repeatedly, but it’s always better when we can show our reader.
Let’s look at the difference
He watched her like a hawk.
Let’s look at how we might show. The example is from my latest novel.
Some occasions required a person to be an extrovert. To mingle with the crowd. Other times one needed to blend into the background. Being able to disguise oneself had its advantages. The ability to be virtually unrecognizable.
Tonight was a time to remain hidden. To observe. Three couples sat at a table close to the stage. Who wouldn’t envy the brunette and her six-foot-four husband? Or the auburn-haired physician and her successful man? But the third couple was the most intriguing.
What exactly was between them? Casual friendship? Something more? The desire to know had been festering for several weeks. It was the reason for tonight’s visit to Pinnacle. To confirm what was already feared.
Which gives the stronger message? Brings more emotion? Increases the tension?
We also need to be aware of using two incompatible metaphors. These are known as mixed metaphors.
This tower of strength will forge ahead.
A tower is a fixed object. It cannot move itself, therefore it can’t forge ahead.
Let’s take a look at a couple of similes from literature that do work.
“…she had tried to get rid of the kitten which had scrambled up her back and stuck like a burr just out of reach.” [Little Women by Louisa May Alcott]
“Time has not stood still. It has washed over me, washed me away, as if I’m nothing more than a woman of sand, left by a careless child too near the water.” [The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood]
In these examples, the words flow and do not call attention to themselves. If well-written, the reader may not even be aware the writer has used a simile.
Using an occasional simile or metaphor is acceptable, but always stop and ask yourself the following questions:
- Is there a way to write this better?
- Am I using similes or metaphors as crutches?
- Have I used too many similes?
- Is this a mixed metaphor?
- Does the simile or metaphor strengthen or weaken my writing?
Let’s hear from you. Do you use similes or metaphors? Do you “bump” on them when reading? Leave a comment below.
Story Empire 
Thank you, Joan. I most useful post.
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Glad you found it helpful, Robbie.
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This is definitly something I am struggling with in my own writing and something I try to keep a look out for while editing. It is much for powerful when you can make a direct statement rather than a simply comparison. I guess practice makes perfect.
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That’s true, Michelle. The more we write the tighter our writing will become. And it’s not that we can’t use similies or metaphors – the key is not to overuse them.
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Reblogged this on Archer's Aim and commented:
A recent post by Joan Hall on Story Empire.
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Thanks for sharing, P. H.
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You’re welcome, Joan.
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I think, as pretty much everyone has already said, similes and metaphors add a tremendous amount to a piece of writing as long as they are not overdone. Your example from your book is great. Yes, it took more words, but the scene it set brings the reader INTO the story and doesn’t leave them on the sidelines watching like a hawk! Great examples, Joan!
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Thanks for the compliment, Jan!
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Great post, Joan! I love a well-inserted metaphor or simile, but it has to have purpose. Otherwise, it stumps my reading.
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I agree. When they’re poorly written or overdone, they stump my reading.
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Excellent post, Joan. Sharing and saving… 🙂 Thanks!
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Glad you found it useful, Bette!
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Thank you, Joan. Good discussion.
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Thanks for stopping by today, John.
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My pleasure.
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Great advice, Joan, as usual!
While writing I don’t really think consciously about similes and metaphors, but I’m pretty sure I use the first more than the second, and sometimes I overuse it. I believe that using analogies while writing the first draft is just a way to remind myself what I want to convey so that I can work on it at a later stage to say it better.
I don’t mind similes while reading if they are well executed but metaphors… well, I find some authors overuse them just for the sake of showing off their writing skills. That irritates me more than anything.
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I like the idea of using analogies on the first draft. I tend to agree with you on similes vs. metaphors. Overuse of either one of them can irritate the reader.
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I’m with the majority here. I love them when they’re done well and used sparingly. I’m not a fan if they’re poorly crafted or overused.
A well-composed comparison will only shine if it’s not surrounded by others, particularly if the others are weak. I’m proud of some of mine, embarrassed of a few, but will always remember the truly special ones that made my heart sing as I wrote them.
Nice refresher, Joan.
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I agree. When done well, they enhance a story. I’ve written some rather poor ones myself. Thankfully I’ve had good critique partners that pointed them out.
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I use similes and metaphors in my work, but keep an eye out for not overdoing them. I remember a short story I wrote in my twenties in which I overdid the use of similes. I wasn’t aware of it until a critique group member pointed it out. From that point on, I’ve kept an eye out to make sure I don’t overuse.
As for metaphors, I positively love them when they’re done well. The part of me that loves lyrical writing is drawn to them, but once again, they shouldn’t be overused.
Good post today, Joan!
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That’s they key. Don’t overuse them and make sure they fit. If done well, the reader will never notice. If done poorly, they can destroy an otherwise good piece of writing.
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I use them all the time. Sometimes as a broader theme for SE posts. I don’t know that I ever knew the difference, so this is cool. At my age, I’ll probably forget by noon, but for a brief moment, I know. Music is full of these things, dust in the wind, brick in the wall, etc.
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Laughing at your age comment because I have to remind myself of the difference. Ah, music! Good examples you used.
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I think I need to learn how to write metaphors, for I must have been missing when they covered them in school!
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I’ve had to do “refresher” courses. LOL. I don’t often use them in my writing but they can be useful tools.
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Great post, Joan, with some lovely examples. I do use similies and metaphors in writing. I only bump into them when reading if, as you say, they’re done clumsily. Reblogged this on: https://harmonykent.co.uk/using-similes-and-metaphors/
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That’s the key, Harmony. Using them wisely. When done correctly, they can help the story flow and get the writer’s point across. Thanks for the reblog!
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